Building a Supportive Relationship When Your Partner Has OCD
Supporting a partner with OCD involves understanding, patience, and encouragement. Here are some ways you can support them:
Educate Yourself: Learn about OCD, its symptoms, triggers, and treatments. Understanding what your partner is going through can help you provide better support. You may look to read about other peoples OCD stories online or read about different sub-types of OCD.
Communicate: Talk openly with your partner about their OCD. Encourage them to share their feelings, fears, and struggles with you. Effective communication can strengthen your relationship and help you both navigate challenges together. Look to create a space that is safe for your partner, where there is empathy, non judgement and understanding. Look to remain engaged with them and show your care towards their thoughts and feelings. Remain curious about their problems.
Be Patient: Dealing with OCD can be frustrating, both for the person experiencing it and their partner. Be patient and understanding, especially during difficult times. Remember that recovery is a journey, and progress may be slow. Progress may not look linear, more like peaks and valleys.
Avoid Judgment: Avoid criticizing or judging your partner's thoughts or behaviors related to OCD. Instead, offer reassurance and understanding. Validate their feelings and experiences without dismissing them. Create a safe space that is free of judgement. Sometimes OCD themes can be taboo or sexual/harm based in nature, making them extremely difficult for someone to want to talk about.
Avoid Reassurance: It is common for someone with OCD to want reassurance from their partner. It is even more common for someone that is not educated about OCD to give that person reassurance. The reassurance will end up reinforcing the OCD, feeding into it. Instead, your partner will need to practice sitting in their discomfort. Over time, this can help them learn that distress and anxiety will always pass, and that they can continue pursuing what they value in spite of these feelings.
Encourage Treatment: Encourage your partner to seek professional help from a therapist who specializes in OCD treatment. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) are commonly used to manage OCD symptoms. Offer to accompany them to appointments or provide logistical support as needed. Without treating OCD, there can be tends for it to get worse if the person continually engages in their compulsions consistently.
Support Healthy Habits: Help your partner maintain a healthy lifestyle by encouraging regular exercise, adequate sleep, and a balanced diet. Physical well-being can positively impact mental health. Reducing caffeine use can play a healthy role in reducing distress from OCD.
Set Realistic Expectations: Understand that OCD can be challenging to overcome, and setbacks may occur. Set realistic expectations for progress and celebrate small victories along the way. Goals that are SMART- Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time Sensitive.
Practice Self-Care: Supporting a partner with OCD can be emotionally draining. Take care of yourself by engaging in activities you enjoy, seeking support from friends or a therapist, and setting boundaries when necessary.
Encourage Self-Help Strategies: Help your partner develop coping strategies to manage OCD symptoms, such as mindfulness, relaxation techniques, or keeping a journal. Encourage them to use these strategies regularly. In therapy you can learn response prevention measures and grounding techniques to help reduce stress.
Be a Source of Encouragement: Offer words of encouragement and praise for your partner's efforts in managing their OCD. Let them know that you're proud of them and that you're there to support them every step of the way.
Remember that every person with OCD is unique, so what works for one individual may not work for another. Be open to adapting your support strategies based on your partner's needs and preferences. If you feel that OCD has had a negative impact on your life or a loved one, you might consider counseling and ERP to learn how to handle it more effectively. Please feel free to reach out for a free consultation, where we can discuss impacts of OCD and benefits of counseling/ERP.
