Sexual Orientation OCD (SO-OCD)
Sexual Orientation OCD or (SO-OCD):
(SO-OCD) is a sub type of OCD that is seen as intrusive thoughts/obsessions and compulsions surrounding a persons sexual orientation/sexuality. (SO-OCD) has been referred to in the past as Homosexual OCD or HOCD but this term has been discouraged due to lack of sensitivity and accuracy.
(SO-OCD) Fears:
Do I have a sexual orientation other than the one I thought I had?
Denial of their “true” sexual orientation.
Sexual orientation could abruptly change (e.g., “turn” gay or straight).
(Will their relationship with their current partner end? Can they ever feel truly secure in their sexuality?)
Common (SO-OCD) Obsessions:
Doubts about my sexual orientation.
What if I’m gay and I don’t know?
What if I’m actually straight and I don’t actually love my partner?
I got sexually aroused when watching a sex scene from a movie. What does this mean about me?
Doubts about my behaviors- Did I look at that person in a sexual way? What if I am not straight?
What if my orientation changes in the future?
Common (SO-OCD) Compulsions:
Avoidance Behaviors-Avoidance of certain people/places/situations. I might avoid the gym, sex scenes in movies, certain stores or places.
Checking Behaviors- Checking physical behaviors. Looking for groinal responses. Being hyper-aware of the physical sensations they are experiencing. Obsessing with this groinal response and viewing this as proof of their true sexual orientation.
Compulsive porn watching as a way of confirming or disproving their doubts.
Mental Review- Replay certain memories over and over again. Reviewing a certain moment compulsively. Questioning my behaviors or what I had said. Trying to get that 100% certainty over my actions.
Reassurance Seeking- Asking my friends or loved ones trying to get the reassurance over my doubts. Looking for them to give me the answer. This could look like asking someone physically or making posts online looking for the reassurance.
Researching- Spending excessive time on message boards, Reddit, Youtube etc. Similar to reassurance seeking behaviors.
Praying: People with SO-OCD may pray excessively. Praying often throughout the day or week. Looking to find clarity on their sexual orientation or for forgiveness for perceived “sins.”
Sexual identity is an important part of how we view ourselves. Most people have little trouble knowing who they find attractive.Varying factors, like religion, community values, social fears, etc., may create obstacles for someone trying to actualize their inner self. The obsessive thoughts associated with SO-OCD can cause confusion and fear. These thoughts can be extremely distressing and lead to a negative impact on ones functioning. SO-OCD is a form of OCD: it is not a gender or sexual orientation crisis in the average sense. Looking at oneself, the person does know the truth about their orientation. But with OCD being the doubting disorder, the person will have trouble believing that general intuition due to the constant obsessions and doubts.
Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) looks at the idea that triggering situations and thoughts are at the core of OCD. Ongoing exposure to these triggers without engagement in rituals can reduce the severity felt. As a licensed mental health therapist trained in ERP, I will assist you through the exposures and how to implement effective response prevention measures. If you feel that OCD has had a negative impact on your life, you might consider counseling and ERP to learn how to handle it more effectively. Please feel free to reach out for a free consultation, where we can discuss impacts of OCD and benefits of counseling/ERP.
